Heart and Soul Read online

  Heart & Soul

  Heaven & a Cowboy Book 3

  Erica Penrod

  Copyright © 2018 by Erica Penrod

  All rights reserved.

  No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means, including information storage and retrieval systems, without written permission from the author, except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.

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  Contents

  Introduction

  Prologue

  Chapter 1

  Chapter 2

  Chapter 3

  Chapter 4

  Chapter 5

  Chapter 6

  Chapter 7

  Chapter 8

  Chapter 9

  Chapter 10

  Chapter 11

  Chapter 12

  Chapter 13

  Chapter 14

  Chapter 15

  Chapter 16

  Chapter 17

  Chapter 18

  Chapter 19

  Chapter 20

  Epilogue

  About the Author

  Heart & Soul

  Heaven and a Cowboy Book Three

  Introduction

  Everyone has a soulmate, and everyone has a choice. When someone makes a choice contrary to their soulmate, angels are sent, for soulmates are the link between the eternities.

  Prologue

  Abbie

  If you’d told me when I was seventeen that I’d be sorry to see Nikki, my high school nemesis, move across the country, I might’ve laughed, but not now. Nikki and her husband, Travis, had become good friends of mine. My little girl Halle Jess ran with delight in the midmorning sun, chasing after Travis and Nikki’s five-year-old twins, Landon and Laney.

  “I brought you something.” I handed the small gift to Nikki as we sat on her front porch. Her blue eyes reminded me of an ocean, calm and serene, but below the surface, a whole other world existed.

  She scrunched her perfectly arched brows. “What’s this?”

  “Just a going-away present.”

  “You didn’t need to do that.” She untied the ribbon from the box, her delicate fingers trembling.

  “Really, it’s not much.” I put an arm around her. “Are you okay?”

  “I’m trying.” She fumbled with the lid and removed the tissue paper. “Oh my gosh, I love it.” Nikki stared at the photograph I’d taken of our kids. Laney was in the middle, one arm draped around Landon and the other around Halle. She ran her thumb over the glass, then pressed the frame to her chest. “Seriously, this is wonderful.”

  “I’m glad you like it.”

  Nikki caught a tear before it fell down her cheek. “I don’t want the kids to see me upset over leaving Greyson. This is a big move for them, and right now they think it’s all an adventure.”

  I hugged her. “Maybe that’s what you need to do. Think of the new house, the new friends and opportunities that are waiting for you in North Carolina.”

  She smiled, but her eyes were still filled with tears. “I know, and really I’m grateful that Travis’s firm is expanding, but it’s so hard to leave everyone behind. I love it here.”

  “We’ll keep in touch,” I tried to reassure her.

  “Promise?” Nikki searched my face, and I was reminded yet again of just how beautiful she was and how carrying twins didn’t seem to affect her body at all. I should hate her for that. My own stomach never looked the same after Halle was born. But Nikki had grown to be just as beautiful on the inside as she was on the outside.

  I hugged her one more time. “I promise.” My eyes fogged up with tears and I prayed we would stay close, because I was really going to miss her.

  1

  Abbie

  Twelve Years Later …

  I held my breath as we pulled into the drive to the huge new rambler home on the outskirts of Greyson. Caleb and I hadn’t seen Nikki and Travis in forever, and now they’d returned. In the beginning, Nikki and I had called each other, and we saw them when they came in for Travis’s grandfather’s funeral, but that felt so long ago. So much had changed … and not for the better.

  “Take a deep breath.” Caleb reached over and took my hand, his touch still strong yet calming like the color of his stone-grey eyes. His thick, light brown hair, now furrowed with hints of grey, still beckoned for me to run my fingers through his natural curls at the nape of his neck. After eighteen years together, he still had the power to take my breath away with one kiss. “Everything will be just fine.”

  “I just don’t know what to say.” I bit the corner of my lip. “I mean, what do you say?”

  “Maybe just start with a hug.”

  I nodded, but tears already blurred my vision. A little over a year ago, we got the news that Laney had been killed in an auto-pedestrian accident. She was just shy a week of her sixteenth birthday. At the time, Caleb’s father just had open-heart surgery and we couldn’t leave to attend the services. I’d sent a card and flowers and tried to call several times, but I couldn’t ever reach Nikki. Caleb spoke with Travis and offered our condolences. Travis said Nikki had been inconsolable and wasn’t coping well at all. My heart had broken when I’d heard the news, but nothing like what I felt now. I guess the distance softened the blow, but now, knowing I would see Nikki and knowing her little girl was gone made everything feel real and personal. I thought of my own precious daughter and what I’d do if I lost her.

  “Yeah.” I pushed on my tear ducts. “I will, but I just don’t want to say the wrong thing, you know?”

  Caleb stopped the truck and shifted into park. “All you can do is love her. We both know what it feels like to lose someone, and I don’t know that there is anything we can say to make anything better. We’ll just keep showing up and be there for them.”

  I saw Jess’s face in the back of my mind and smiled. He was Caleb’s younger brother and the boy I’d loved in high school. When he died, he left a hole in my heart so gaping wide, I never thought I’d feel again. But then God gave me a gift and I dreamed of Jess and knew he was happy, and that let me move on.

  Caleb and his crew finished the house for Travis and Nikki only a couple days ago, and a team of landscapers were still laying sod and finishing curbing as we got out and walked up the drive.

  “I still can’t believe we pulled this off.” Caleb held my hand and surveyed the massive brick, stone, and hardy board house. “When Travis called and asked me if I could get it done before the school year started, I didn’t think there was any way possible, but we did it.”

  “It’s amazing.” I loved the slate-blue color with the natural stone and wood timbers. “But it seems like a lot of house for three people.”

  “It is. Travis said something about Nikki’s mom coming to live with them. There’s a full mother-in-law suite on the west end.”

  “Really?” I knew Nikki’s relationship with her mother was complicated. Her parents divorced when she was young, and she’d felt like she’d been caught in a tug-of-war and then discarded once that wasn’t fun anymore. “I feel so terrible. I don’t even know what’s going on in her life.” I swallowed the lump in my throat. “Other than Laney, of course.”

  Caleb stopped and pulled me to him, then pressed his lips to my forehead. “She’s here now, and you can be here for her.”

  His steel-colored eyes steadied me, and I nodded. We continued to walk and stopped in front of the door. Caleb raised his hand to press the doorbell when the door swung open.

  “Hi, guys.” Travis stood there with a weary smile on his face. He was still breathtakingly handsome, with his dark eyes and artistically drawn features. Hints of grey swirl
ed through his thick crop of black hair, but his tawny complexion seemed off, like he’d been ill, or perhaps it was just tinted with sadness.

  Caleb stepped in and embraced Travis, then patted him on the back. My throat tightened at the pain etched into the fine lines along his brow and the corners of his eyes. Travis let go of Caleb and then stepped toward me. I stood on my toes and wrapped my arms around him.

  “I’m so glad to see you.” Travis cleared his throat. “It’s been way too long.”

  “Yes, it has.” I squeezed him, then let go. “We’re so sorry about Laney.”

  “Thank you.” Travis gestured towards the inside. “Please come in. I’ll show you around. Although Caleb knows more about this house than I do.” He feigned a smile.

  “Just followed your plans.” Caleb took my hand and led me down the entryway. The aroma of newness filled my head. The walls were white with dark wood beams along the ceiling that tied into the wide-planked wood floor. A long side table with a modern flair ran the length of the wall. A large round glass vase with a tall neck was filled with willow branches and sat on one end. Silver candlesticks in a variety of shapes and sizes stood beside a cardboard box. A huge mirror was propped against the opposite wall, and plastic totes were stacked on either side.

  “As you can see, we’ve still got a lot of unpacking to do.” Travis came from behind us and pushed a box to the side with his foot. “Nikki’s this way.”

  We followed him through the archway into the great room. Vaulted ceilings made the space open and airy, while a stone fireplace gave off an inviting ambience. The windows along the back side let in the magnificent view of the hay fields and mountains in the distance. To the left was the adjacent kitchen.

  “Hi.” Nikki stood behind an L-shaped island with a white and grey marble top.

  My voice hitched when I saw a shell of the woman I used to know. “H-H-hey.” I walked over, and she met me halfway. I took her in my arms, feeling the bones in her body. I closed my eyes and prayed that I’d be able to offer some sort of comfort. “I’m so glad you’re back.”

  She retreated from the embrace. “I think the change will be good.”

  “Nik, I’m so sorry about Laney.” My breath caught in my chest as tears filled my eyes. “I’ve been thinking about you and praying for you all.”

  “Thank you.” Her calm, steady voice concerned me. I thought about how I’d felt after Jess died, when the world continued to spin, and I couldn’t move. Nikki appeared frozen to me: still fairy-like and beautiful, but in an ice queen sort of way. Her eyes no longer looked like a sunlit sea, but more like a river trapped by the weight of winter. Her skin was snowy white, and her lips were painted a pale pink.

  “How’s Landon?” We sat down on the stools behind the counter. I tried not to stare at this hollowed version of my friend and remember who she was before death had stolen her daughter.

  “I’m not sure.” She adjusted herself in the seat. “He doesn’t say much.”

  Caleb walked over, leaned down, and gave Nikki a hug. “I’m sorry,” he said, not much louder than a whisper, and then stood up.

  “Thanks,” she said, her smile worn around the edges.

  “We’re headed out back. I want to show Caleb where I’m thinking about putting the barn and the arena.” Travis bent down and kissed Nikki on the cheek. “We’ll give you girls a chance to catch up.” His eyes darted from Nikki’s to mine, and I got the impression he was pleading for help.

  “Okay.” Nikki didn’t seem to notice the look on Travis’s face. When I first saw the grief on Travis’s face, I assumed that was for Laney, but now I knew that Travis lost so much more than his daughter.

  Travis and Caleb went out through the French doors and onto the back deck. I turned back to Nikki. “The house turned out beautiful.”

  “Yeah, it did. Caleb did a great job.” She surveyed the room with a vacant look in her eyes, and I wasn’t sure how much she actually saw. “Would you like a tour?”

  I wanted to see the house, but I was more concerned about her. Besides, her invitation felt more like a statement than a question. “Sure, in a little bit.” Grief hung over her like a dark cloud and the fog was so thick, I had to squint to see the girl I once knew.

  She exhaled and seemed glad I’d not accepted her offer. I got the feeling Nikki didn’t want to exert that much energy, because she didn’t seem to have much of a reserve. “Do you remember that dream I had, clear back when I was dating Caleb and you were dating Travis?”

  I fell back in the chair, caught off guard by the sudden shift in conversation. I’d forgotten she’d dreamt of Travis. My own dreams, once so powerful and the guiding force behind where I am now, had become hazy—or rather, I hadn’t thought about them in a long time. “Yeah, I remember.”

  “I saw Travis as clearly as I see you now, and we were in a house, a lot like this one, and I knew that I loved him beyond anything I’d ever believed possible. And I didn’t even know him.” She looked down at the floor, and when she glanced up at me, I expected to see tears, but there were none. “I knew God gave me that dream, because I might have missed Travis if I hadn’t seen him in my sleep. It was like a gift.”

  I took her hand. “I know it was.”

  She pulled back and stood up. “So where is He now? I know Laney is gone, but I need something … anything. A dream to point me in the right direction? And what about my son? I know he’s lost without her. They’ve never been apart for more than a week, and now Landon’s supposed to live his life without the other half of him?”

  Flashbacks of my dreams of Jess and the times I’d seen him before Caleb and I got together floated to the surface. But did I tell Nikki that I’d been comforted by a dream, or would that make things worse? I didn’t know if she’d ever dream of Laney, but I decided that hope might be the only thing I could offer her. “Nikki, I—”

  “Mom, where is the box with all my posters and stuff for my room?” A handsome boy came into the room. Landon. My heart warmed at the sight of him. He was tall and built like his father—the same dark eyes, brows, and square jawline—but his hair was just a shade darker than his mother’s honey-colored blond. “Hi.” Landon looked at me, but I wasn’t sure if he knew who I was.

  “Landon, you remember Abbie, Halle’s mom?”

  “Kind of.”

  “You’ve grown up since I’ve seen you last.” I knew he was cute as a kid, but now he was striking.

  “Yeah, I guess,” he answered, and then glanced back to Nikki. “Do you know where my stuff is or not?”

  I flinched at his tone, but Nikki stood still. “I think it’s still in the garage.”

  Landon left, and Nikki walked over to the sink. She pressed her palms against the counter as if she were trying to keep from falling. Pain and despair suffocated the room and I wanted to run outside, just to fill my lungs with air. I hoped there was an angel up there somewhere or that a dream would come and carry away the pain, because right now this family was trapped in a nightmare.

  2

  Halle

  I’d looked forward to the first day of my senior year until now.

  “All I’m saying is, just look out for Landon and maybe show him around.” Mom stood at the kitchen counter. “He’s not going to know anyone besides you.”

  I shook my head and zipped up my backpack. “He doesn’t know me, Mom. I haven’t seen him since we were kids, and he didn’t even follow me on Instagram when I sent a request.” One that my mom made me send. So embarrassing.

  Mom’s brown eyes softened. “I know, and that’s my fault. I should’ve done better at staying in touch with them.” She smiled. “Do me a favor and just help him out if you can.”

  “Fine.” I glanced at my phone. “I’ve got to go or I’m going to be late.”

  “Okay.” She placed her glass in the sink. “Have a great day, honey. Dad’s really excited you got into that intro to architecture class. That’s all he talked about before he left this morning.”

&
nbsp; My mouth snapped shut as I bit off the words I wanted to say. Instead I forced a half smile. “Cool. Bye, Mom.”

  Inside the cab of my truck, I drew in a breath and let my head fall back against the seat. My fingers wrapped around the cracked leather of the steering wheel, in the same places where my dad’s hands used to fit. This once was his truck and the seats were worn but comfortable, and I loved it.

  The truth was, I wasn’t looking forward to the architecture class. But my dad was so passionate about me signing up for it that I did it just to make him happy. That’s the difficult part about being an only child: there’s a lot of pressure to be everything my parents want. There’s no one else for them to live vicariously through.

  Dad wanted to be an architect, but he couldn’t because he didn’t want to leave my grandparents when my uncle died, so now he’s hoping—like, really hoping—that I want to be one. My mom is just a crazy book lady. She’s the librarian for the Greyson library, and while I like to read, I don’t want to spend my life in the library.

  The back lot was already full when I pulled into the school. I circled a couple times and finally found a spot about an hour away from the back doors. I slid out of the truck and shut the door, the trusty squeak announcing my arrival to the entire parking lot.